Tragic death leads to unexpected friendship

Published 7:30 pm Friday, July 1, 2016

Lee Gulliver loved to walk.

The British citizen was making his way — walking, no less — from New York to Raleigh on an evening more than four years ago, most likely planning to buy a plane ticket home to England.

Fate had another plan for him, though. A car with its high-beam lights blaring came down a road in Warrenton, and a young driver on the other side tried to shield her eyes from the blinding light. Seconds later the young driver’s car struck Gulliver and sent him rolling back across more cars.

Gulliver didn’t die on impact. The short time he spent in the hospital before his death saw a group of strangers voluntarily keeping vigil around his bed. When one had to leave, another filled in the circle.

Prayers would not bring him back.

Lee Gulliver’s story is one of tragedy. Alone in America and a family at home in England with no idea about the news to come. Tragic, yes, but also a story of hope.

Unbeknownst to his parents, Pete and Shirley Gulliver, Lee was an organ donor. His heart went to one person, his lungs to another. His liver made it to Gloria Sheler, a Washington resident.

Sheler was diagnosed with liver cirrhosis in 1991, and as time progressed, so did her liver’s deterioration. By 2011, she had experienced liver failure three times.

Things did not look good, according to her husband Ray.

In February 2012, Sheler was at the top of the organ donor list, and after Gulliver’s death, his liver was given to her.

“I probably wouldn’t have lived long enough to see my grandson born,” she said. “I had already almost died twice.”

BUBBLY: The Gullivers strolled along the Washington waterfront on Friday morning, sipping on their first Coca-Cola.

BUBBLY: The Gullivers strolled along the Washington waterfront on Friday morning, sipping on their first Coca-Cola.

The time that followed continued along an emotional rollercoaster. Sheler’s liver transplant went well, and her grandson was born while she was still in the hospital, but less than two weeks later she suffered a stroke. Her brother became ill days later, and she lost her mother and best friend in the next couple of years.

Across the pond, the Gullivers were struggling to bring their son’s ashes back home. The shipping cost was much too high, but money raised by still-unknown good Samaritans (perhaps those praying over him) made it possible. The family never received his belongings.

Shirley Gulliver said the family still isn’t 100-percent sure the correct ashes were sent back to England. They buried the ashes anyways beside those of their older son, but not knowing is what continues to eat away at Gulliver.

For her, closure has yet to be obtained.

“Some days I do get angry with God,” she said. “My life don’t seem to be getting any easier.”

Gulliver said she can’t help but think that another family out there has Lee’s ashes and is struggling with the unknown, the lack of closure, as well.

There was still hope to be had, however. About two years after Lee’s death, the Shelers reached out to the Gullivers, explaining to them about the liver transplant.

“It’s a really hard letter to write because what do you say to someone who’s lost a child?” Gloria Sheler recalled. “When I got her first letter, I cried and I cried and I cried.”

An unexpected friendship formed — both women say they learned to use Facebook to communicate with each other. Although thousands of miles away, the couples soon discovered they had a lot in common.

Last July, the Shelers went to visit the Gullivers in Trowbridge, England. And this July, the Gullivers have come to visit Washington, their first trip out of the country and first time on an airplane.

The couples have a bond that can only be described as a phoenix rising out of the ashes. Friendly banter is the norm, and keeping with the Fourth of July theme, there is no shortage of jabs from Ray Sheler about beating the British in the Revolutionary War.

But Shirley Gulliver said a part of her feels that Lee lives on through organ recipients like Gloria Sheler. Even in his death, he saved lives and continues to inspire hope.

“I feel closer to Lee,” Gulliver said. “We never would’ve met these wonderful people.”

Gloria Sheler still experiences some health complications, but she said she is grateful to God for pulling her through every storm.

“We want to show how someone else’s organ has saved my life,” Sheler said.

In many ways, the Gullivers’ trip to Washington brings everything full circle, and further solidifies the belief that Lee’s memory is living on in some way.

More importantly, it offers a small glimmer of hope that the Gullivers can find closure.